Parkour Videos

I must apologise profusely for the recent downtime we have experienced. And boy was it an experience! It’s almost comparable to a ride on a rollercoaster…and then losing your wallet on the loop-the-loop.

Nevertheless, my fellow swamp ducks, we are back with a wallop! Not literally, but you get the picture. This video is of Blane doing what Blane does best - so I’m guessing there isn’t a Mrs Blane.

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Now this is what you would refer to as a traceuse, boys and girls, that is a female who performs parkour. A male who performs parkour is known as a traceur. Class over! Now, I’ve just hit the play button, so get to it, miss!

By my own admission, I felt a little uncomfortable when realising this was an entire video devoted to 2 men rolling around together in the sand. But as it happens, and to my undiluted delight, the video turned out really well. And what I mean by really well is I don’t have to inform my parents that I’ve been watching homosexual material. That wouldn’t go down well.

As for the music? I have no idea. You tell me for once. All except the guy who commented on a previous parkour video informing me that the rap was in fact French, not Russian. Your exempt from this unless you feel like being clever again.

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Urban ninja on crack? I think they’ve all taken too much Datura. The video consists of a few Chinese guys walking around Toronto with a video camera, with one Chinese guy attempting to hump as many statues as humanly possibly. Who’d have thought that’d qualify as entertainment? Some say it does!

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Now back to the old school Parkour performers. Yes it’s those crazy Latvians. The tune sounds familiar to one of Linkin Park’s numbers, although I don’t listen to Linkin Park so I have no idea what I am saying; I think it’s some kind of Russian rap, anyone care to correct me on this? No, I didn’t think so.

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I never knew the Italians went in for all this stuff, but, in my innocence, it appears as though they do! Overlayed with an old retro classic, Can’t Stop The Rock.

Nonetheless, there is a downside, boys and girls, and that is there appears to be a significant lack of hot Italian female spectators — it’s at times like this I feel as though the world can never live up to my impossibly high expectations.

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What on one hand could be classed as one guy jumping around ruining his knees, has been classed many times by others as the original urban ninja. So I’ll go with the latter, you can make up your minds. What’s not up for question is this is some fairly good stuff, what is up for question is can he do this with a walking stick?

Moreover, some nice individual has suggested that the song is Give It All by Rise Against, which saves me many hours sifting through appalling music to find that out for you myself.

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These guys, one guy, bunch of guys, group of women. Not sure, they all look the same to me. Though either way, they seem to be able jump very high which is

rather impressive. As for the music, I hear it all too often when X-Factor sneakily appears on the television, so I’d rather not know its name.

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Just maybe one of the most impressive free running videos I’ve seen.

The individual who uploaded it onto YouTube claims the 2 songs are Excalibur by F.C.B and Excalibur by Nick Skitz — you never know, do you? All I know is the original song is a classical piece entitled O Fortuna by Carl Orff — am I showing my age?

Nonetheless, I’m sure you’ll all come to agree with me on my first point of this post. Equally important, the clip is of a Belgian free running clan called Speeders. So there you have it.

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A selection is fairly impressive parkour. The predominant soundtrack is Pendulum - Hold Your Colour, then War In Me by Kenna is spliced in there at the very end. To much of your internal disgust I do not have Kenna’s song so you’ll have to do without or fly off in search. Best of luck with that.

Not to promote it too much in one post, but I’d highly recommend Pendulum’s album, this can be purchased right here.

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